#SidelinePoetry

Emanuel_Leutze_-_Westward_the_Course_of_Empire_Takes_Its_Way_-_Capitol — Emanuel Gottlieb Leutze, “Westward the Course of Empire Takes Its Way” (1861, United States Capitol)

As Tennyson never wrote, in spring a middle-aged man’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of soccer poetry. Some new ones from yesterday (old ones are here: Sideline Poetry | The New Yorker):

Things I Learned Today on I-70

God exists and there's evidence
There's a firm called Jungle Law
If you're arrested for possession, you should call them
If you all had voted for Trump
There'd be No More Bullshit
A giant flag and so many billboards told me so#SidelinePoetry
— Sam Cohen (@cohenss) March 21, 2021

Westward the Course of Empire Makes It Plain

It's a long buildup
Through strip mall towns
Past the stadium
And then the glass towers pop up
And then they're gone
And it's a flat dry sea
Of containers and rails
The things that once made everything
Up to date#SidelinePoetry
— Sam Cohen (@cohenss) March 21, 2021

So Much Dribbling

So
Much
Dribbling
While teammates stand alone
Forlorn
Or make fruitless runs, unseen
One is tempted to ask:
Do you think you are faster
Than a ball, kicked?
And to answer, preemptively
No
You are not#SidelinePoetry
— Sam Cohen (@cohenss) March 21, 2021

Ask a Referee

There is nothing illegal
about playing the ball
while on the ground

Playing the ball while
on the ground
is NOT NECESSARILY
dangerous play

It all depends
on what the player
is doing

Tell your parents
For god's sake
Tell them#SidelinePoetry
— Sam Cohen (@cohenss) March 21, 2021

They Call the Wind Mariah

Okay maybe they do
But on game day
At Compass Mineral Sporting Fields
In Kansas City, Missouri
In the middle of all this treeless flat
They call it a pain in the ass#SidelinePoetry
— Sam Cohen (@cohenss) March 21, 2021

(My in-house editor points out that those fields are actually in Kansas, which I knew, but my fingers forgot it when typing on my phone in the High Wind.) And here are a couple more from last week, on a theme. It helps for one of them if you know French, which I don’t:

Creve Coeur

O Sideline America
Your mask hangs under
Your chin, useless
So you can vape#SidelinePoetry
— Sam Cohen (@cohenss) March 13, 2021

In Creve Coeur

My heart bursts
Is tired
Is cold
Dies
In Creve Coeur
In translation

Ça te passe le nez#SidelinePoetry
— Sam Cohen (@cohenss) March 13, 2021